Breaking Tradition: Why More Couples Are Opting for Civil Wedding Ceremonies
In today's rapidly changing society, more and more couples are breaking from tradition and opting for civil wedding ceremonies. Gone are the days when a grand church wedding was considered the only acceptable way to tie the knot. Instead, couples are choosing the simplicity, flexibility, and intimate nature of civil ceremonies, which allow them to personalise their special day and make it truly unique.
The rise in popularity of civil wedding ceremonies can be attributed to several factors. Firstly, couples are becoming more diverse in their backgrounds and beliefs, and a civil ceremony allows them to create a ceremony that reflects their values and preferences. Additionally, civil ceremonies offer greater flexibility in terms of location and time, making it easier for couples to plan their dream wedding without the restrictions imposed by religious venues.
This however is only true for couples having an ‘Independant Civil Celebrant’ or a ‘Humanist Celebrant’ officiate their ceremony. More on this later.
Furthermore, cost plays a significant role in this shift. Civil ceremonies tend to be more affordable than traditional weddings, saving couples a substantial amount of money without compromising on the joy and meaning of the celebration.
Overall, the trend towards civil wedding ceremonies represents a departure from convention, giving couples the freedom to design a wedding that truly reflects their love story and individuality.
The rise of civil wedding ceremonies
Civil wedding ceremonies have been around for a long time, but they have recently gained more popularity. According to recent statistics from the UK Office of National Statistics, civil ceremonies have become more popular than religious ceremonies.
Here is a short section of that report taken from the ONS on the number of marriages in the UK up to 2020, when the pandemic had a huge impact on marriages and divorce rates for that matter.
There were 85,770 marriages in England and Wales in 2020, a decrease of 61.0% from 219,850 in 2019. Marriages in 2020 were affected by the impact of the closure of registration services, leading to postponed and cancelled weddings, during the coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic. This is the largest annual decrease ever recorded and is the lowest number of marriages recorded since the first full year of marriage records in 1838.
In the 30 years previously, from 1989 to 2019, the number of marriages decreased by 36.6%. However, in 2020, there were 82,959 opposite-sex marriages, a decrease of 61.1% from 2019 (213,122) and there were 2,811 same-sex marriages, a decrease of 58.2% from 2019 (6,728). As in previous years, there were more female same-sex couples marrying (57.2%) than males. For same-sex civil partnerships, the majority were male couples (61.5%). See our Civil Partnerships in England and Wales release.
Over the last 30 years there has been a steady increase in the percentage of marriages which are performed as civil ceremonies and in the last four years alone civil ceremonies have increased from 76.0% of all marriages in 2016 to 85.5% in 2020. In 2020, the lowest percentage of religious marriages was recorded since records began.
In 2019, 60% of weddings were civil ceremonies, while only 24% were religious ceremonies. This shift in preference is not limited to the UK but is a growing trend worldwide.
You can view the full report here (PDF)
According to Hitched, civil wedding ceremonies are set to be ‘The’ most popular way for couples to get married in 2024 and this will only continue in demand and popularity for the foreseeable future.
Traditional vs. civil wedding ceremonies
Traditional weddings are often held in religious venues and follow a set of customs and rituals that have been passed down through generations. Civil ceremonies, on the other hand, can be either religious or non-religious and can be held in a variety of locations, including town halls, stately homes, and even outdoors. While traditional weddings can be beautiful and meaningful, they may not suit everyone, especially those who are not religious or who want to break from tradition.
Civil ceremonies offer more flexibility and allow couples to design a ceremony that reflects their values and preferences. They can choose their own vows, readings, and music, making the ceremony more personal and unique. Civil ceremonies also tend to be shorter than traditional weddings, which means that guests can enjoy the reception without a long wait.
Benefits of opting for a civil wedding ceremony
There are several benefits to choosing a civil wedding ceremony. Firstly, it gives couples the freedom to personalise their special day and make it truly unique. They can choose a location that has special meaning to them, such as a beach or a park, and create a ceremony that reflects their values and beliefs.
Secondly, civil ceremonies are more flexible in terms of location and time. Couples can choose to have their ceremony at any time of the day or night, and they can choose a location that is convenient for them and their guests. This flexibility makes it easier for couples to plan their dream wedding without the restrictions imposed by religious venues.
Thirdly, civil ceremonies tend to be more affordable than traditional weddings. Couples can save money by choosing a location that is free or low-cost, and by not having to pay for religious officiants or other religious fees. This makes it easier for couples to have the wedding of their dreams without breaking the bank.
Read my blog on ‘The Ultimate Guide to Budgeting for a Wedding Celebrant’ here.
Legal requirements for a civil wedding ceremony
Civil wedding ceremonies are yet to be legally recognised in the UK, which the ‘Law Commission’ has completed its report, on the recommendations to reform the UK’s wedding law, to one that gives couples more choice over where and how their wedding takes place. you can read my blog on the ‘UK Law Reform’
Here is a short summary of the legal requirements for a civil wedding ceremony in the UK according to current UK marriage law:
Notice of marriage - Each partner must give notice at the register office where they live. This is valid for 12 months.
Approved venue - The marriage must take place at a registered civil venue. Common options include register offices, hotels, and stately homes.
Licensed officiant - The ceremony must be solemnised by a registrar or an authorised person registered to conduct civil ceremonies.
Vows - Partners must each declare they know of no legal reason why they cannot marry and pledge to take each other as their wedded spouse.
Witnesses - Two witnesses aged 16+ must be present to see the marriage promises made and sign the register.
Marriage schedule - The partners, officiant, and witnesses must sign the marriage document which makes the marriage legally valid.
Residency - At least one partner must have resided in England or Wales for 7 days immediately prior to giving notice.
Legal age - Both partners must be aged 16+ to marry with parental consent or 18+ without consent.
Single status - Partners must not be currently married or in a civil partnership. Evidence of divorce or dissolution may be required.
Consanguinity - The partners must not be related within prohibited degrees of relationship.
In summary, civil weddings in the UK require proper notice, approved location, officiant, vows, and witnesses to be legally binding under the Marriage Act. The partners must meet requirements for residency, age, marital status, and consanguinity.
Planning a civil wedding ceremony
Planning a civil wedding ceremony is similar to planning a traditional wedding, but there are some key differences. Firstly, couples need to choose a location that is suitable for a civil ceremony. This can include a registry office, a stately home, or an outdoor location. They also need to choose a celebrant to officiate their ceremony.
Secondly, couples need to decide on the format of the ceremony, including the vows, readings, and music. Couples choosing to have a registrar wedding ceremony will find they are restricted in what they can and cannot do or say in their ceremony. The same of course applies to couples choosing a more traditional religious wedding, perhaps in a church. The current marriage law depicts what can and cannot be said during these types of ceremonies, and more importantly, what ‘Must’ be said and repeated by each partner, and witnessed.
It is also common practice for registrar wedding ceremonies to be both officiated and witnessed by a registrar and clerk, moreover, referred to as a celebrant. This however, is not the choice of many couples, once it is known that despite being referred to as a ‘Celebrant’ which of course is the associated position, a registrar celebrant is not an independent civil celebrant in the same context, and therefore, the ceremony the registrar celebrant can deliver, is that of the same restrictions, and obligatory lawful wording and stature, as required by the current marriage law.
If couples wish to have a truly bespoke and unique ceremony, written for them, and about them, then they must choose an independent civil celebrant or a humanist celebrant, and not think that a registrar celebrant, are the same thing.
Couples can choose to write their own vows or use traditional ones, and they can include readings that are meaningful to them. They can also choose music that is special to them, whether it's a live band or a playlist.
Lastly, couples need to plan the reception, including the venue, catering, and entertainment. They can choose a venue that is close to the ceremony location or one that is more convenient for their guests. They can also choose a caterer that specialises in the type of food they want, whether it's a formal sit-down dinner or a casual buffet.
Choosing the right venue for a civil wedding ceremony
Choosing the right venue for a civil wedding ceremony is an important decision. Couples need to consider the location, size, and facilities of the venue, as well as the cost. Some popular venues for civil ceremonies include town halls, stately homes, and outdoor locations such as gardens or beaches. Couples can also choose a venue that has special meaning to them, such as a place where they had their first date or a family home.
Personalising your civil wedding ceremony
One of the benefits of an independent civil wedding ceremony is the ability to personalise it and make it unique. Couples can choose their own vows, readings, and music, and they can include special touches such as a unity ceremony or a special ritual. They can also choose a theme or a colour scheme that reflects their personality or interests, such as a beach theme or a vintage theme.
Budgeting for a civil wedding ceremony
Budgeting for a civil wedding ceremony is important, especially if couples are trying to save money. While civil ceremonies tend to be more affordable than traditional weddings, there are still costs involved. Couples need to consider the cost of the venue, the officiant, the reception, and any other extras such as flowers or decorations. They also need to consider the number of guests they want to invite and whether they will be providing transportation or accommodation.
Read my blog on ‘Budgeting for a wedding celebrant’ here.
Common misconceptions about civil wedding ceremonies
There are several misconceptions about civil wedding ceremonies, such as they are not as meaningful or romantic as traditional weddings. However, this is not true. Civil ceremonies can be just as meaningful and romantic as traditional weddings, and they offer more flexibility and personalisation. Another misconception is that civil ceremonies are only for those who are not religious. However, couples of all faiths and beliefs can have a civil ceremony if they choose to.
Conclusion: Is a civil wedding ceremony right for you?
In conclusion, civil wedding ceremonies are becoming more popular among couples who want to break from tradition and create a unique and personalised wedding day. They offer greater flexibility in terms of location and time, and they tend to be more affordable than traditional weddings. While there are legal requirements and planning involved, the benefits outweigh the challenges. Whether couples choose a town hall, a stately home, or an outdoor location, they can create a ceremony that reflects their values, beliefs, and personality. If you're considering a civil wedding ceremony, do your research, plan carefully, and enjoy your special day!